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Exhaling


 The Boat.......
 

The Boat
 
 
They say the happiest days in life are the day you buy a boat and the day you sell It!!..Well, here's a good BOAT story!!
 
Joe and John were identical twins..Joe owned an old dilapidated boat and kept pretty much to himself..One day he rented out his boat to a group of out-of-staters who sank it..Joe spent all day trying to salvage as much stuff as he could and was out of touch all that day and most of the evening.
 
Unbeknownst to him, his brother John's wife died suddenly.  When he got back on shore, he went into town to pick up a few things at the grocery store.  A kind old neighbor woman mistook him for John and said:  "I'm so sorry for your loss.  You must feel terrible."  Joe, thinking she was talking about his boat said:  "Hell no! Fact is I'm sort of glad to be rid of her.
 
She was rotten old thing from the beginning.  Her bottom was all shriveled up and she smelled like old dead fish.  She was always holding water.  She had a bad crack in the back and a pretty big hole in the front too.
 
Every time I used her, her hole got bigger and she leaked like crazy.
 
I guess what finally finished her off was when I rented her to those four guys looking for a good time.  I warned them that she wasn't very good and smelled bad.  But they wanted her anyway.  The darn fools tried to get in her all at one time and she split right up the middle!"
 
The old woman fainted!!!!!!
Posted by SammyJo at 6:32 PM - 2 Comments   Add a Comment  
 

 Saturday Nite Pajama Party
 

 

Posted by SammyJo at 6:39 PM - 5 Comments   Add a Comment  
 

 First Kiss
 

I'm not to sure exactly what I am feeling at this moment..only that I am feeling something..not good not bad..just feeling and remembering..

I'm thinking of my first kiss...I was like 12 years old..he was this cute little guy with dark hair and rosy cheeks..He seem like the kind of guy who would never know how to talk to a girl much less kiss her..but..he did know how..I remember standing in my kitchen up against the wall and he did it..he kissed me..I thought it would be like a little peck..but it wasn't..he really kissed me...I got so scared I just about ran away from him..straight to the back door..trying to act calm and cool but..I was far from it...He was so sweet..he understood..I was also afraid what would my Mom say..omg what would she say if she knew I kissed him...
 
Well..yes..I did tell her..and I asked her if it was ok..yes..I know some kids don't say a word..but..I was a different kind of kid...she was like so understanding...and had a little talk with me and told me it was ok to kiss him...Wow..I was like so surprised...and yes..you better believe I did some more kissing...I really liked it..but of course..the French thing at that time..was a big no no..not for me..lol...That had to take time to come about..lol...
 
Sometimes I wonder what ever happened to him..I wonder if he ever got married..if he is happy and if he ever thinks of that first kiss with me...No..No..I didn't love him..I was way to young to feel that kind of emotions for a guy..but..he is forever part of me..forever in my heart...My first Kiss....................
 
Posted by SammyJo at 2:11 AM - 4 Comments   Add a Comment  
 

 MEN NEVER LISTEN.....
 

 
THIS IS ENTIRELY TOO FUNNY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
 
In a Chicago hospital, a gentleman had made several attempts to get into the men's restroom, but it had always been occupied.
 
A nurse noticed his predicament.
 
Sir, she said.."You may use the ladies room if you promise not to touch any of the buttons on the wall."
 
He did what he needed to, and as he sat there he noticed the buttons he had promised not to touch.
 
Each button was identified by letters:  WW, WA, PP and a red one labeled ATR.
 
Who would know if he touched them?
 
He couldn't resist...He pushed WW. warm water was sprayed gently upon his bottom.
 
What a nice feling, he thought.  Men's restrooms don't have nice things like this.
 
Anticipating greater pleasure, he pushed the WA button.  Warm air replaced the warm water, gently drying his underside.
 
When this stopped, he pushed the PP button.  A large powder puff caressed his bottom adding a fragil scent of spring flower to this unbelievable pleasure...The ladies restroom was more than a restroom, it is tender loving pleasure.
 
When the powder puff completed its pleasure, he couldn't wait to push the ATR button which he knew would be supreme ecstasy.
 
Next thing he knew he opened his eyes, he was in a hospital bed, and a nurse was staring down at him.
 
"What Happened?"  he exclaimed.  The last thing I remember was pushing the ATR button.
 
"The button ATR is an Automatic Tampon Remover.  Your penis is under your pillow."
 
 
MEN NEVER LISTEN.
 
Posted by SammyJo at 7:27 PM - 11 Comments   Add a Comment  
 
 I Dreamed of You...
 

So..let me tell ya...yesterday I was like sleep deprived...broke..but was I the happiest person..yes indeed..As normal..I went to bed late..really late..so there was only like a few hours sleep..but during that few hours I had a dream..Wasn't any spectacular dream but a wonderful dream to me..2 years ago this past Dec 17..my 20 year old nephew died of drug OD...and the year before that my brother his dad had died also...so..my nites have not been what you call easy...in fact..pure nightmarish...
 
Well...I have not dreamed of my nephew once in a good way since he died..actually I don't think I really dreamed of him..I really and truly prevent the dreams from happening..to continue..as I fell into my coma sleep because i was so tired...the dream happened anyway..but..there he was in my dreams...he was himself...I could see him clear as if I were awake and he were here with me...I could even hear his voice...My brother was even there for only a short moment..but the more interaction was with my nephew...Some how we were in his old house that he lived in as a young child..we were going through his room gathering things up to move...and he grabbed hold of this box of some sort..looked as though some paint had fallen onto it..he told me..look Nannie...here is the box I made for my cards...He was always creating things..and he loved his baseball cards..collected so many...I really don't remember too much of this dream..just that It made me feel so good..when I awoke..I headed to the restroom..and as I sat there...it hit me..that I had dreamed of my Nephew..that it was not a nitemare..and all I could do was cry...not sad tears..but happy tears...I thought of another friend here on the stream...I just knew she was praying for me and I knew then that God was listening...he knew what I needed and gave it to me..maybe not completely but in a small way...it really made my whole day so wonderful..I was so happy all day..not one thing ruin it for me..even as tired as I was all day..and yeah..I even hit the sack at 9:30 last nite....something so rare with me...and I slept like a baby..my mind was clear...
 
It may not seem like much..but to me it was everything...
 
Oh yeah..also...I had to make my way to Cato's store to exchange a pair of pants..and while there I was chatting with the girl..like I always do..never can shut up..lol..anyway..I may have myself a lil part time job..yeap..can you believe it..and the way I want it..2 days a week...days..like 9 or 10 am to 2 in the afternoon..just like I had been telling my hubby I wanted...I still can do my interpreting at my liesure..and still have that 2 days a week income..some extra cash which we can surely use...I still don't regret quitting at wal mart though..I am in such peace away from that place...
 
One more thing..see I told you I never shut up..lol lol...I walked 4miles at the track yesterday..yea..I shocked myself...today..however..we only got 21/2 miles in there..we were sorta sore lol lol...
 
So..I think I will zip up for now..because I could surely continue...but..I will close for now...
 
My thankful note
I am so thankful for gifts in small pkgs..for they always contain large surprises....
 
God bless all...
Love Ya
SammyJo
Posted by SammyJo at 5:44 PM - 3 Comments   Add a Comment  
 
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