Exhaling by SammyJo

Blogstream > Writing > Blog > Page #11

Exhaling

Friday December 28, 2007

Handle with Care...

So...it seems as though Christmas went off without a hitch...Praise God!!!...My sister came down..and also her daughter came from another state..which my sister hadn't seen her in a while..so all were happy with that...To my surprise...not one arguement..I was in such shock...lol..usually there is at least one arguement..lol..UMM...We really did have a nice and peaceful time...smiles and laughter...but...also tears from missing those who were no longer here with us...We all stood together to take a photo..and it seemed so strange..looking at another photo on the wall beside us with the ones we have lost...so it seemed the photo was hard to take..so at one point my Mom grabbed hold of my lil one..and said just us...but the rest of us just joined down to her level and there we took the most perfect pic...

How sad it is..to take loosing so many to make you realize ...but..I think us older ones really do ...now don't get me wrong..there are still some things I don't agree with ..which is the norm in families..For example...my sister mention to me that she has plans to move back to our town...after 30 yrs being away..but her reasonings really baffle me...yes I understand..she sees that many in our family are passing away..and she wants to spend the time with our mom...but..just lil things she said...made me feel as though she is waiting for our Mom to die...and for the wrong reasons..Don't get me wrong...I know the day will come...which my heart is already having trouble with that idea...cause I am the one here who has seen all that has happened in the past years..but..I don't need anyone to rush it along....or all of a sudden..be the backbone..My Mom is blind when it comes to my sister...cause she is deaf..and she feels my sister don't really understand things fully...and she caters to her wrongs...but..I feel she does understand more than given credit for..

So..I just listen to her when she said her lil words..and never did I make any comments..no anger..no fights.."Which is wonderful for me..see how I've changed some..LOL'...I just figured..she would go away as she always does...and God would handle all...but..I can't lie to myself...I do love my sister..but I truly don't want her to move back here..Is that selfish???..maybe a little...but..I have my reasonings..I know what will come of it..and I pray..it doesn't happen...My heart is healing..but key word "IS"...not "DID"...I can no longer make promises that damage my soul...I refuse to..So ..Please God...handle with care...

Besides...these worried thoughts...all things went great...my niece got to spend time with my boys...and seemed to really enjoy themselves...we even went to the theater and seen the movie "I am Legend"...which by the way was pretty good...we shopped at the mall together...ate out..it was really wonderful this past week...but...also my sister didn't bring a certain someone with her this time..so I do think that made the difference...anyhows...tomorrow ..they are off back to their homes in other states...so we shall say our farewells...until another time...and then we will hopefully welcome in the new year as peaceful as we did Christmas...well..maybe with a lil something to make my tummy warm...and some good music...Smile...

So there you have it...nothing Grand...nor Spectacular....just your average boring life...but...to me...is everything....and I like it that way...

Posted by SammyJo at 3:53 AM - 4 Comments Add a Comment

Monday December 24, 2007

Thank You Jesus..for making things New...

Merry Christmas

(Brad Paisley)
Mother - do not cry for me
All of this is exactly how it's supposed to be
(Sara Evans)
I'm right here. Can you hear my voice?
My life, my love, my Lord....my baby boy

(Brad Paisley)
As they nail me to this tree
Just know the Father waits for me
(Sara Evans)
God how can this be your will?
To have your son and my son killed?

(Brad Paisley)
Whatever happens...whatever you see...
Whatever your eyes tell you has become of me
This is not...
Not the end...
I am making all things new again

(Sara Evans)
I remember when you were born
In that manger where I first held
You in my arms
So many miracles and lives you've changed
And this world repays you how?
With all this pain

(Brad Paisley)
As they nail me to this tree
Just know the Father waits for me
(Sara Evans)
God how can this be your will?
To have your son and my son killed?

(Both)
Whatever happens(Whatever happens)...whatever you see(I don't wanna see)...
Whatever your eyes tell you has become of me
This is not(Tell me it's not...
Not the end...
I am making all things new again

(Brad Paisley)
Whatever happens...whatever you see...
Whatever your eyes tell you has become of me
This is not...
Not the end...
I am making all things new again

(Brad Paisley)
Whatever happens...whatever you see...
Whatever your eyes tell you has become of me
This is not(No)...
Not the end...
I am making all things new again

Posted by SammyJo at 5:15 PM - 12 Comments Add a Comment

She read my Heart......

Unfreaking believable!!!....I've come across a song..that is like so totally me..I can't believe it...I think that Kellie Pickler must have been reading my blogs..reading my heart...and made a song from them lol...I mean every word is ME!!!Jeepers.....I've come on songs that have had some of what is me..but never never have I've found one that speaks me so loudly...I hope the video plays..but I'm posting the words also...The song is "I'm On My Way" ...by Kellie Pickler...its a song to make you have courage and faith...

So this is my blog...

I'm On My Way Lyrics
Artist(Band):Kellie Pickler

I've felt the power of forgiveness
I know that life can let you down
I'm not blind
No, I don't need a witness
To tell me there's angels all around

My eyes have seen more than they want to
My heart has scars that run so deep
There's tears that I've had to let go
And there's dreams I told myself I'd keep

Now I don't give up easy
I have many miles to go
But I can't wait to get to
What I see down this road
And all my life I've learned to
Just take it day by day
I'm not there yet
But I know I'm on my way

I've looked out the window
When there's no hope In sight
But I swear I heard a whisper
Said it would be worth the fight

So I woke up one morning
And I put my fears aside
Now look how far I've come
From the back of an endless line

Now I don't give up easy
I have many miles to go
But I can't wait to get to
What I see down this road
And all my life I've learned to
Just take it day by day
I'm not there yet
But I know I'm on my way

I still got lessons to be learned
There's a choice at every turn
Someone out there cleared a path
And there's no turnin back

And all my life I've learned to
Just take it day by day
I'm not there yet
But I know I'm on my way
I'm not there yet
But I know I'm on my way
Baby, I'm on my way

Posted by SammyJo at 5:58 AM - 9 Comments Add a Comment

Saturday December 22, 2007

My Anchor Holds

I find myself once again in a place I have been so many times...."Inside Myself"...But..yet...this time it's very different....Explaining it...I can't...Just know that I'm looking around...and really seeing...maybe that is hard to understand for some..but for me..it makes sense...There's no anger...and that to me is a giant leap...It seems as though the evil one has tried his best to bring my peace and love to an end...but..so far I can say he has not won...I don't fool myself into thinking that he will ever give up...but..for this moment...I look him straight on ...and smile a smile of love ....

Thank you all for your prayers ...I know the Lord hears them...for he sends all that love to me...which keeps my heart good...I truly can feel it...and I wish all that for you..

Days are really busy..as Christmas draws near...but..I'm enjoying each and every moment of it..even with the sadness in our life...

So..now once again..I'm off to a busy day as I am sure you all are too...so I just want to wish you all a Very Merry Christmas...May God keep you all in Love...and a Very Happy Birthday to Jesus.....

Love to you all...

The Anchor Holds

I have journeyed

Through the long dark night

Out on the open sea

By faith alone

Sight unknown

And yet his eyes were watching me

CHORUS:

The anchor holds

Though the ship is battered

The anchor holds

Though the sails are torn

I have fallen on my knees

As I faced the raging seas

The anchor holds

In spite of the storm

I've had visions

I've had dreams

I've even held them in my hand

But I never knew

They would slip right through

Like they were only grains of sand

CHORUS:

The anchor holds

Though the ship is battered

The anchor holds

Though the sails are torn

I have fallen on my knees

As I faced the raging seas

The anchor holds

In spite of the storm

I have been young

But I am older now

And there has been beauty these eyes have seen

But it was in the night

Through the storms of my life

Oh that's where God proved his love to me

CHORUS:

The anchor holds

Though the ship is battered

The anchor holds

Though the sails are torn

I have fallen on my knees

As I faced the raging seas

The anchor holds

In spite of the storm

CHORUS:

The anchor holds

Though the ship is battered

The anchor holds

Though the sails are torn

I have fallen on my knees

As I faced the raging seas

The anchor holds

In spite of the storm

Posted by SammyJo at 11:56 AM - 6 Comments Add a Comment

Sunday December 16, 2007

Just Let me Hide!!!!!!

Hiding...Can I just dig a big hole and hide in it forever and ever???????!!!!!!!!...

My friend thinks I'm such a strong ...etc...person..that I am an inspiration to her..that I am what gives her the strength ...OMG!!...Can she be so far from the truth!!!...What a phony am I..!!...I guess I'm good at hiding....but then again...it's no one's problem but mine...I'll survive..have too...but for the moment...my heart aches.....

Thursday evening....I kissed my uncle for the last time...for early this morning..he passed away...in peace he did....in his own home..his own bed...yes...a blessing for him....but heartache for the rest...

I stood earlier today..watching my Mom and her sister cry and realize that they are all that is left of their siblings...of how they have lost a sister and a brother in the same year....They know he is in peace now..but..felt as I do..that we are selfish...we wanted to keep him...to keep all the ones we have lost...

Once again...I see cousin's hearts break at the lost of a parent...and it scares me so badly...Once again we lost someone we love a week before Christmas..Tomorrow will be 3 yrs my nephew died..so ...I guess I'm not so strong...Guess..I really don't want to be!!!...

Once again...I will use my hands to sing a song I once signed at my brother's funeral ...and it puts a very large lump in my throat...for when my uncle saw me do it at my brother's funeral..he told me..that he wanted me to do the same song at his funeral...and I can't believe 4 yrs later...I am going to be doing it...but..I will do it..with so much Love...for him..and for my Mom and his wife and sister....

Is my heart still happy???...I think it is..but...jeepers..it is breaking and so darn scared!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.....

Posted by SammyJo at 8:00 PM - 10 Comments Add a Comment

Pages: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65

About Me

Author: SammyJo
From USA

This blog is about...
Just to be Me. <a href="http://s26.sitemeter.com/stats.asp?site=s26SammyJo" target="_top">... more

My: Profile Gallery Interests Bio Guestbook 100 Things

Bookmark History

Blogstream Sponsors

Have you checked out the new Blogstream site,

Question Stream.com?

Many Blogstream members are there already! Quotes from members: "It's like blog lite!" -- "I like the instant gratification!" -- "Stop spectating, get in the game!"

If you have not joined in, you are really missing out!

Send Free
Just Saying Hi
Greeting Cards at
Greeting Cards.com

Good Morning